Quotes and sayings from Groucho Marx

"It looks as if Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms."

"I drink to make other people interesting."

"Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows--marriage does."

"In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians, and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people."

"The only game I like to play is Old Maid...provided she's not TOO old."

"Quote me as saying I was misquoted."

"There's one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him. If he says "Yes", you know he is crooked."

"Behind every successful man stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife."

"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."

"I do not care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members."

"Marriage is a wonderful institution. But who wants to live in an institution?"

"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."

"Because we were a kid act, we traveled at half-fare, despite the fact that we were all around 20. Minnie insisted we were 13. "That kid of yours is in the dining car smoking a cigar," the conductor told her, "and another one is in the washroom shaving." Minnie shook her head sadly. "They grow so fast . . . ""

"You're only as young as the woman you feel."